There can be a catch 22 to “fake it till you make it.” The positives outweigh the negatives to pretending the pain is not there. Telling people I’m in pain just reminds me of the chronic pain and makes me think about it more. However, sometimes people just may think: “Wow, Jessica is being a real bitch!” When really I’m just struggling with pain and/or anxiety. Sometimes I am quiet, sometimes I am sad because the pain is so damn annoying. I rarely if ever even let my husband know when its worse than usual. But, I’m sure he can tell or can he? I don’t really know I guess. At times I want to scream: “I am in so much pain and its killing me and I no longer take medicine and just hold me!” I don’t do that though.
Most people, up until this blog were probably surprised to learn I had brain surgery at the age of fourteen and have struggled with chronic pain since.
I am a stay at home mom, married, functioning with chronic pain naturally and sometimes it is just really hard.