Magic!

Roald Dahl is one of my favorite authors. I believe his is one of the reasons I love reading as much as I do. Matilda was my favorite book as a child alone with James and the Giant Peach. His books always made me happy. I love this quote! I do believe in magic. Not in the sense that most people would think of magic though. I associate magic with miracles. And miracles do come true. I believe that the Universe is always working with us if we are doing our work. For over a decade I did not believe in magic, miracles, or anything positive for that matter. I was suffering with chronic pain and never thought I would ever be happy.

I remember walking around the lake I live on with my dad post Mayo Clinic where I learned how to manage chronic pain naturally and was able to accept I had chronic pain and also learned to be happy despite my chronic pain. I had disassociated the two terms. I was on break from college and beyond excited to be home with my dad. After about a year of working the Pain Rehab’s lessons on managing chronic pain naturally, I went back to school in Denver, Colorado to be a Social Worker. I had a full plate. My chronic pain regiment was a complete day in itself and I was working hard at doing my best in school. School was a great distraction from my pain because I loved learning, especially about how to help people and the different avenues of the social work field and medical field. I was in pain and yet I was happy. Anyways, on that certain day that I was walking around the lake with my dad I remember looking up at the sky and thinking: “Holy hell, I have not thought about pain for over an hour!!” That was truly magic: a miracle. Anyone who suffers from chronic pain can imagine that feeling and knowing that it would feel magical. I was working my ass off at being healthy, working the pain rehab center program, and mindfulness. The universe saw my work and was working with me, no longer against me. Once I began doing well for myself, the universe rewarded me with magic.

I stopped believing in magic and miracles a couple of times post Mayo Clinic. I got wrapped up in stress and life and just sort of quit taking care of myself. I stopped the things I needed to be doing to manage my pain. I was back at the doctor’s once again searching for a cure that I knew intuitively did not exist. The universe stopped aiding me along once I gave up on myself. On February 2nd, 2011 I had my first miscarriage. I vowed that day to find my magic again and start doing what I knew was right to manage my pain. Months went by and I was doing a lot better. I was back to eating healthy, exercising in moderation, doing yoga, meditating, etc. and the universe saw my work. On February 2nd, 2012 my daughter was born. She is truly a miracle. She is my magic. I have to keep working every day of my life for the rest of my life much harder than someone without chronic pain but it is so worth it. I never want to stop believing in magic again. Magic and miracles will continue to happen if I continue to do the work.

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Magic!

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