The Fairy Godmother is absolutely correct. I never thought I would be able to live happily with chronic pain especially without taking medication. Although it is a lot of work, to me it is still a miracle to me. Sometimes we create our own miracles.
I never thought because of chronic pain I would be a mother. And here I am married for two years with a 22 month old daughter. She is a miracle to me. She was the greatest thing to ever happen to me and only reinforces how much I want to have more children. My biggest worry is that I do not know when that will happen. Trying to get pregnant is a very frustrating thing!! Who knew it was this hard?? Ya spend half your life trying not to get pregnant and the second half trying to. My God we are some crazy species. People always say to me: “Once I stopped trying, I got pregnant.” I hear that from so many women, its ridiculous. So what is the lesson in that? Is it that when we focus and obsess about something we are bound to lose? Is it once we let go and just let things happen they fall into place? My inner wisdom knows I will have another child. Even miracles take time!
My Fairy Godmother is my La La (my grandmother) who helped raise me. I believe she does watch over me and I pray to her for love and support because I do miss her so much. She was the first person to know I was pregnant with my daughter, Kayci. I ask her all the time for a sign that I will get pregnant again. If La La was here with me right now she was probably just laugh and tell me I worry too much. Wherever she is, I know she has much more wisdom than I do and I am sure she would say: “Every miracle takes time. Let go. Appreciate everything you have today and know that every thing is going to work out.”