Is it a typical day in New Jersey? NO!! I am sure anyone from Minnesota or Alaska will want to punch me right now but it is freezing here!! Waking up this morning, I could hear the wind and I felt as if I was Dorothy from the Wizard of OZ for a minute. For once, the weather anchors were not exaggerating. It felt like -17 degrees with the wind chill. I lived in Colorado for multiple years and do not remember anything this cold. Granted, I was partying most of the time in Colorado so I may just not remember. Don’t ever lose your sense of humor readers! I knew as soon as I was fully awake that my toddler and I would be inside for the day. We exercised together, did some juicing, and cleaning and she even took a whopping forty minute nap. During her nap I practiced my meditation even though there was so much I wanted to get done around the house. She has chosen today to not only be my shadow but has an insistent need to be carried ALL day. She is around twenty six pounds and as much as I love her, I just can’t do it. She wants to get outside as much as I do. With that being said, it has been a frustrating day. No one ever said motherhood was easy. And I sure as hell know motherhood with chronic pain is HARD!

After “coloring” with her for awhile, I decided to check my email. One of my reader’s wrote me an email that melted my heart. She was so beyond thankful for all my encouraging words and posts that she is managing her pain better and is going to fulfill her passion despite her chronic pain. That is huge!!! When I was suffering like no other, I was almost 100 percent certain that I would never graduate college, never become a social worker, and definitely never have children. After leaving the Mayo Clinic and learning how to manage my pain without medicine I decided to fulfill my dream of helping people and went to school in Denver, Colorado to become a medical social worker. My passion has always been to help people and to become a mother. No, neither pay well but they make my heart and soul happy. Not only that, but I found studying to become a social worker was the best distraction from my pain. I finally loved college because I was managing my pain well and studying something I was passionate about. I am sooo happy that I did not allow my fear of pain to deter me from my passions. It turns out my passions have been the best thing for my pain. When you are studying or practicing something you are passionate about, your brain begins to stop thinking about the pain. The pain is there, I just get so distracted with my passions that I forget about it for the most part.

Whether or not you have chronic pain or any invisible illness, follow your passions. I do not have a lot. My bank account is quite low but I feel fulfilled and happy. I have helped so many people in my profession and now am able to raise my daughter and hopefully more children in the future. Life can be so short, follow your dreams and never allow any fears to deter you from your passion. Sometimes the more something scares you, the more important it is for you to do whatever that may be!!




3 thoughts on “Passion!!!

  1. It is so interesting that your blog is in direct opposition to another blog that I have followed. When I first got sick, I was so darned sick, but I had started a new job and didn’t want to lose my life. So I kept working full time, ended up completing a Master’s degree, and worked for 15 years before I had to call it quits. I don’t regret a day of those years. I know how absolutely tough I can be . . . I never called in sick because I couldn’t figure out which day was worse than the other! I am now passionate about beading and have been doing some knitting and passionate about gardening. You are right, if you don’t have a passion for doing something you might as well call it quits. Great blog! I did a lot of work with social workers and they were always great people to have as members of a medical team. Blessings to you for following your passions!

    • I must clarify that I took the key of moderation into both my school work and my career. I worked about seven to eight hours a day. I was also able to include meditation into my job. I took many of my patients into a meditation group daily which helped both them and myself. I took breaks and my boss new allll about my chronic pain before he offered me job. My biggest mistake was greed. I was later offered a much higher paying job in the social work field and left an amazing job for 20, 000 more a year. I ended up falling apart hating my job, working for a corporate company and working about eleven hour days without lunch breaks much less time to incorporate my chronic pain methods into my day. I ended up losing my job and my health. However, my daughter never would have come into this world had I not lost that job so everything happens for a reason. Thank you for reading!!!!! Good for you for allowing yourself to be happy

      • I had some of those jobs that were the pits, but I just moved forward and found the right path. Sometimes you have to go where your spirit leads you and it can be a bumpy road, but as long as you get where you are going it’s a good thing. Take care and be well!

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