Talk About Your Joys!

“Talking about our problems is our greatest addiction. Break the habit. Talk about your joys.”

I spent the day with one of my most positive, true, uplifting friends. She radiates such positive energy that I literally feel better by just being in her presence. This is not to say she does have struggles, as we all do but yesterday we spent about seven hours with our children just being playful and talking about our blessings. It was not even a cognizant thing: talking only about the positive things in our lives, it just kind of happened. I realized last night as I was lying in bed reading how utterly peaceful and happy I felt and it did not take this quote to realize why. I truly did not complain once yesterday and what a difference. I did not think about pain or my anxieties. I was just truly playful, happy, full of laughter, and filled with a peace I have not experienced in months.

We are a society addicted to talking about our problems. When you go through your day tomorrow, notice how many more people you hear speaking negatively than speaking positively. We all have something to be grateful and happy about. I totally understand if you are going through the worst part of your journey with chronic pain that nothing looks happy so I am not speaking to those readers. Until I found a way to accept and manage my pain, I truly found it impossible to find any joy. I said daily: “All I want is to feel healthy and nothing can make me happy until I no longer have chronic pain.” So, with that said I understand where you are and you will one day get to a point where this post will mean a great deal to you. There is a reason I do not speak about pain: ever. I speak about acute pain such as labor or when I hit my forehead on the freezer door but I will never talk about my personal chronic pain. Many of my readers know that if I am really struggling I tell the people close to me: “I am sorry if I am not myself: I am having a difficult day.” This post sums up why I do not speak about my pain or pain levels or even where my pain is. The more I talk about pain, the more I think about it. The more I think about pain, the more my pain intensifies. Does it suck sometimes that people really do not know when I am struggling bad: yes. However, it beats the alternative and at the end of the day it is my job to make myself happy and healthy.

Surround yourself with people who lift you up: friendships/family is not quantity but quality. Try and not complain (a lot easier said than done) but what do you have to lose? Do you want to constantly be complaining and letting others know how shitty you feel or do you want to be happy? The Universe needs more positivity and positive energy: that starts with you.


Talk About Your Joys!


One thought on “Talk About Your Joys!

  1. Sam says:

    I definitely agree w/ focussing on the positive things in life b/c it is very easy to find yourself so engrossed in your struggles that u can fail to notice the positive & beautiful things in life. I certainly don’t always follow that path though & have many moments where I get consumed by pain but mostly when I have high levels of back pain & stiffness that lasts for too many days and often leaves me practically immobile & I feel like I just break. At those times I do feel there is something in me that needs to express that grief & at times share that burden that I so often carry alone. If possible these are times that I call those closest to me & vent & ask for help to distract myself & always try to also talk about good things in my life or theirs & find things to laugh about. I also speak w/ my therapist about those lowest moments & b/c I enjoy painting & other artistic expressions I try to paint or draw or create something when my pain levels allow it (I also sometimes write Jess :D). I don’t necessarily paint or draw things that have anything to do w/ pain or my body but feel those times that I struggle w/ my emotions can also be times I create something I find remarkable. The idea of transforming something that causes me so much difficulty into something positive feels very rewarding. I still have to work on focussing on the good things in my life & do find myself complaining more than I’d like sometimes & I also still have times that I get frustrated when I feel people don’t understand chronic pain or how difficult it can be or think they don’t believe me but it’s something I’m continuing to work on & be more aware of.

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