“Don’t forget to love her. The little girl you used to be. Perhaps she lies within you, untucked sleeping peacefully.”
If you read my blog on a regular basis you know that my daughter and family mean the world to me. I learn more from my toddler than I have ever learned from anyone in this world. She reminds me of what is important in life: living in the present moment, enjoying the little things, and not worrying whether or not she gets her little feet covered in mud. I do not remember really anything from my past at this age and she probably will not either. However, my inner child subconsciously remembers everything and she is not healed as most of our inner children are not. Now, most of you think I’m crazy: stay with me. Every one of us has had some kind of issue as we were young children. Even the happiest kids, with the greatest lives have gone through something they do not remember. My biggest issue as a kid was the fear of abandonment. I never thought that fear and pain would follow me into adulthood and put road blocks in my path to happiness and safety. However, it has and a wise woman whom I look up to has been telling me this for many years. The first time she said the words: “inner child” I thought she was speaking a different language. However, the more I read about our inner children, the more I saw how much my past (some I remember, some I do not) has truly affected me. That fear of abandonment has caused me to do things I probably would not have done if this fear did not exist. It has destroyed relationships, friendships, and caused me a great deal or anxiety. This is even before I had brain surgery and chronic pain. Not gonna lie, the chronic pain has not helped me deal with healing the inner child that lies within me. All those fears of abandonment have made me worry too much about how I raise my daughter. I never want her to have those fears or feel unloved. She is the best little girl in the world and I want her to feel safe, protected, and learn the important things in life before she reaches an age where I no longer can make the impact I am able to now.
I truly believe that if anything is holding you back in life and you want to make changes, you must begin so find your inner child. How do you do this? There are many meditation cds’ and books that help you find your inner child, my favorite: Louise Hay (shocker!) All of us with an invisible illness: chronic pain for most of my readers can benefit from this and healing your inner child may in fact help you manage your pain. Who wants to go back in time and think about the things that caused them pain? Not many of us. However, whether you see it or not the scars (even minimal ones) that were there when you were a little girl or boy have followed you into adulthood. I would love all of you to think about any issue you are facing right now in your life. Finances, relationships, marriage, friendships, careers etc. Whatever it is that is causing you stress, see what may have happened in your childhood that is causing your roadblock. This is a huge topic so I am not going to go crazy writing about it. I just want all of you to sit with this for a bit and feel free to ask me questions or call me nuts, either works. Sit with this and I will write more on this topic in the next coming weeks.
Many of us have a wounded inner child that needs to be healed in order to be happy today, tomorrow, and always.