“Note to all of us: Treat yourself the way you would treat a small child. Feed yourself healthy food and make sure you spend time outside. Put yourself to bed early, let yourself take naps. Don’t say mean things to yourself, don’t put yourself in danger. (your skull and your heart are still as fragile)”
This is such an important reminder to all of us, whether we suffer from an invisible illness or not. We are our biggest enemies in this world and are so hard on ourselves that I wonder how any of us get through the day with any type of smile left on our face. We do not even know how to take compliments, it is true and you know it. Say something nice about someone’s shirt or hair today and see the reaction you receive. I am guessing the receiver (who did not receive the compliment by the way) of the compliment said something like this: “Stop it. I look terrible. I wish I had hair like yours.” Or something along those lines. How can we receive a compliment from another person when we do not believe it about ourselves? How great and empowering would it be to be able to say: “Thank you. I love it too” without feeling odd or self centered? We should be treating ourselves better than anyone else treats us and sadly end up putting our own selves at the bottom of the totem pole.
I have had to be very selfish in ways because of how I choose to manage chronic pain. However, with a family and kids and responsibilities I have had to learn how to compromise my world of managing chronic pain with the needs of others. However, I still have to make my health a number one priority because if I don’t, everything in my life will fall apart: including the people I love most. I have to continue practicing the tools that help me manage chronic pain and sometimes that means putting my needs before anyone else. With that said, the needs of my daughter come before my own most of the time: that is being a mother and a parent and I have no problem putting my daughter first because being a mother is my greatest joy and has always been my biggest dream. If I was not so in love with being a mother, I would not want more children! Luckily, her schedule and mine are quite similar as I have followed the sleeping regiment of a toddler since I learned how to manage chronic pain naturally.
However, I am my biggest critic. And I have written this before, but my inner critic is an asshole. If anyone talked to me the way my mind talks to me I would be in tears. I need to give myself a break and not listen to the bs my mind spits out into my soul. I do not need to internalize anything negative said by others or usually said on my own. I should be my biggest fan. I am with me one hundred percent of the time and I know my needs better than anyone. If I treated myself as well as I treat my three year old, I know I would feel a ton better about many things. We all would.