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One Day at a Time

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THE REIKI AFFIRMATION

Just For Today,

I will not worry

I will not be angry

I will do my work honestly

I will give thanks for my many blessings

I will be kind to my neighbor and all living things

I love what is shown above and my favorite line in The Reiki Affirmation is: Just For Today.  Our world is never just about today, in fact we are rarely living in the moment.  It is not even noon here in New Jersey and I have already spent about ten minutes mourning the past and then maybe five more minutes missing the past and then twenty minutes or so projecting into the future.  That was until I saw the above: JUST FOR TODAY.  I think we can all do the above just for a day.   The sad yet honest part is that even as I write that: just for today, I realize just how difficult even one day is to follow the above affirmations.  However, we do have power over our thoughts: we do.   It is the most powerful thing we have but the most difficult to use.  I have written this before and gotten laughs but it is very true: my mind and inner critic is such an asshole.  Do you ever just want to crawl into your mind and yell: SHUT THE HECK UP!  I AM TRYING TO HAVE A GOOD DAY!  Well, I have: way too often.

For today, I will try and live in the moment and each time one of my worries enters my mind I am going to use one of the tools I use to manage chronic pain.  I will find a distraction or follow one of the other affirmations above which is to count my blessings.  I will not yell at my mind as much as it drives me nuts but will gently shift the thoughts to something positive.  I have anger in me.  There are personal struggles I have had to deal with that have caused me anger.  Logically, I am well aware that anger is a useless emotion and only ends up hurting the self but I am human.  I feel pain both physical (obviously) and emotional.  Maybe, just for today I can let go of that anger.  I can only change how I react or respond to a situation or person and I have faith in myself that I can let go of this anger, just for today.

I have so much to be grateful for.  I have a beautiful daughter who can be a real toddler at times and make me want to pull my hair out but ah what a blessing she is to me.  She continues to teach and inspire me and fill me with a love that is almost scary.  I will never find the words there are to explain the love I have for my daughter.  I am managing chronic pain naturally, something I never thought I could do.  I am helping thousands of people through my writing: fifteen years ago I wanted to take my own life because of this invisible illness.  Just yesterday a package arrived in the mail from a famous writer in the UK.  Her name is Vidyamla Burch and she has chronic pain.  She is a published writer, speaker, and has worked with some of my personal heroes.  She was not only kind enough to read my blog but sent me her book with a note in it that reads: “Dear Jessica, here is the book I wanted to send you.  Enjoy and keep writing and offering your gift to the world.”  This is a big deal and I was so wrapped up in things I am going through right now that I was not even the excited Jessica I would have usually been.  I am reaching people and not just the people who I am helping but writers that I look up to and are idols to me.

Just for today I want to follow The Reiki Affirmations.  Just for today could turn into tomorrow and possibly the next day.  However, I am tired of thinking about the future.  It is exhausting.  I want to practice these concepts just for today and I am asking you to do the same with me.  I know how hard they are.  They should not be hard but are minds are so wired that the above is not the norm for us as a society, especially for those of us with chronic pain.  Can we do this together?  Just for today.

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